So, it's the time of year when the 5 Christmas lists start rolling out at the Yochum household.
They work on their lists and then present them to their dad so that he can read them out loud at the dinner table.
This year's lists included:
Ashley's list, not including the St. Bernard dog, came up to about $2000.
Amanda only had 4 items on her list; one of them was for her dad to quit smoking
Alyssa pretty much wants money so she can go shopping and also really wants a hot pink digital camera. (do they make hot pink cameras??)
Alex wrote as small as he could to fill up an entire page. His items ranged from a python to a bowling ball, but the main thing he wants is a hunting license
(never mind that you need to be a certain age, take a safety class and have a gun besides a bb gun to hunt)
And besides basically copying what Alex had on his list, Austin also wants a personal refrigerator and freezer for his own snacks.
I just love seeing the boldness when kids create their wish lists. The sky is the limit in their minds. Ashley knows there's no way she is going to get even half of her desired gifts, but that doesn't keep her from asking.
Austin asked for his own personal fridge and freezer last year- he didn't get it, so it is on the list again for this year. His desires haven't changed and he is going to put it down once again and let his desires be known.
It makes me think of my approach in asking for things from God. Sometimes I don't ask for things because I want to "be content". But seeing these wish lists makes me think- Ask for it all- why not? If it's not in my best interest God isn't going to give it to me. But I bet He gets joy out of me feeling free to ask, just like I crack up when I read some of the stuff on the kids' lists.
In my 20's I had the boldness to ask for the world and really believed it could be mine. To be honest almost all of the things on my "wish list" with God were answered. Then I somehow just grew "content" and have stopped asking for things. Funny how that content thing can be positive on one hand and then negative on another hand.
So I think it's time I make a new list and see what God might have for this next season of life.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Adoption..
Adoption requires a ton of paperwork and one of the requirements is your social worker making sure your house is safe according to state standards. I remember when we first got our list of home stuff we had to have. On the list was a fire extinguisher. We didn't have one, so we made a trip to Home Depot to pick one up. I remember thinking- how many couples having a baby are stocked up with a fire extinguisher? Diapers, burp cloths, but probably not that.
The day our social worker was coming out to update our home study, I thought I would check the list more closely to make sure I hadn't missed anything. One of the things listed was an emergency fire escape plan. Uh... not something Chris and I regularly discuss at dinner. So, I get out a piece of paper and best I can map out the floor plan of our house, draw arrows indicating what doors we would use to exit and make the cheesiest fire plan you ever saw. When the social worker came to that question, I handed her my lovely chicken scratch piece of paper. We both knew it was ridiculous as all get out, but she still had to ask me. Then she asked if Chris and I have practiced our emergency plan. I looked at her and didn't want to lie, but come on... do you really think we pretended to have a fire and enacted a practice session? Our social worker was very sweet and she knew it was dumb, but she said, "Let's go ahead and practice it together, so I can say you did it". At that point of our meeting Chris was in the back room copying drivers licenses or something legal like that, so I yell back "Chris, we're pretending there's a fire so we can practice our escape plan." So the 3 of us proceeded to fake yell & act scared that there was a fire and go to the door while I pretended to call 911. We got a good laugh out of it and the state of TX can legally endorse us as worthy to raise a child.
I read a stat that 1/3 of Americans have considered adoption, but only 2% ever follow through. That makes me so sad.
I think there's all sorts of reasons why- too much paperwork, too much money, not sure how I would bond with a child I didn't give birth to, etc...
Sure there's all those issues, but it's worth every piece of paper we had to fill out and I would buy a fire extinguisher for each room if I had to. I remember holding my baby girl for her first overnight stay with us and with tears in my eyes I told her how much I loved her and how she was worth every penny we had to spend and even more. I watch her now in her new environment- surrounded by people who love her so much- and think of what her life would be like otherwise. It truly is an amazing story of God's love and redemption.
One of our dreams for our new church in Madison is that we could be a place that inspires people to care for orphans and at risk kids. I used to feel shy about saying that, but I don't anymore. It has become a passion of mine. I heard of a small church in a rural area of Texas that was filled with a bunch of folks that had a heart for orphans. They found a small orphanage and as a church committed to find a home for each of the 30 kids in the place. They emptied the orphanage!! Some opened their homes, others their pocketbooks and together they gave these kids families.
I dream of Madison Vineyard being a place where dozens of children and babies find forever homes, where we can raise thousands of dollars to send to organizations like Love 146 who care for at risk kids involved with the sex slave trade, where people get inspired to dedicate their lives to be advocates for orphans in the world.
I am so thankful for our adoption journey and believe this is just the beginning of what God has in store for us and others.
The day our social worker was coming out to update our home study, I thought I would check the list more closely to make sure I hadn't missed anything. One of the things listed was an emergency fire escape plan. Uh... not something Chris and I regularly discuss at dinner. So, I get out a piece of paper and best I can map out the floor plan of our house, draw arrows indicating what doors we would use to exit and make the cheesiest fire plan you ever saw. When the social worker came to that question, I handed her my lovely chicken scratch piece of paper. We both knew it was ridiculous as all get out, but she still had to ask me. Then she asked if Chris and I have practiced our emergency plan. I looked at her and didn't want to lie, but come on... do you really think we pretended to have a fire and enacted a practice session? Our social worker was very sweet and she knew it was dumb, but she said, "Let's go ahead and practice it together, so I can say you did it". At that point of our meeting Chris was in the back room copying drivers licenses or something legal like that, so I yell back "Chris, we're pretending there's a fire so we can practice our escape plan." So the 3 of us proceeded to fake yell & act scared that there was a fire and go to the door while I pretended to call 911. We got a good laugh out of it and the state of TX can legally endorse us as worthy to raise a child.
I read a stat that 1/3 of Americans have considered adoption, but only 2% ever follow through. That makes me so sad.
I think there's all sorts of reasons why- too much paperwork, too much money, not sure how I would bond with a child I didn't give birth to, etc...
Sure there's all those issues, but it's worth every piece of paper we had to fill out and I would buy a fire extinguisher for each room if I had to. I remember holding my baby girl for her first overnight stay with us and with tears in my eyes I told her how much I loved her and how she was worth every penny we had to spend and even more. I watch her now in her new environment- surrounded by people who love her so much- and think of what her life would be like otherwise. It truly is an amazing story of God's love and redemption.
One of our dreams for our new church in Madison is that we could be a place that inspires people to care for orphans and at risk kids. I used to feel shy about saying that, but I don't anymore. It has become a passion of mine. I heard of a small church in a rural area of Texas that was filled with a bunch of folks that had a heart for orphans. They found a small orphanage and as a church committed to find a home for each of the 30 kids in the place. They emptied the orphanage!! Some opened their homes, others their pocketbooks and together they gave these kids families.
I dream of Madison Vineyard being a place where dozens of children and babies find forever homes, where we can raise thousands of dollars to send to organizations like Love 146 who care for at risk kids involved with the sex slave trade, where people get inspired to dedicate their lives to be advocates for orphans in the world.
I am so thankful for our adoption journey and believe this is just the beginning of what God has in store for us and others.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Grocery Store Snapshot
So, part of my nanny duties is a weekly trip to the grocery store- buying food for 5 kids and their dad is quite an event. Usually 2 or 3 kids like to go with me; on occasion all 5 like to come.
(Yeah, I let 5 kids go grocery shopping with me- I have a soft spot when it comes to these kids.)
This past week just the 2 boys went with me. We had to run some errands in a different area of town, so we ended up going to a different grocery store than normal. It was my first time to ever take them there. As we pulled up they both said they remembered going here with their mom. Once we got inside they said they totally remembered it and were so excited. I can't tell you what joy this brought me to hear them say this. Anytime they mention memories with their mom I want to capitalize on the moment.
Austin just celebrated his 5th birthday when his mom started her downward spiral before her death. Alex was 6. When I think about these little guys I know that they are not going to have many memories of their mom. In fact any time I can help preserve a memory, I want to do so.
The longer I live, the less and less I remember my own mom. I have what I call "snapshot" memories of her. I can remember different scenes in my mind, almost like a mental photo, of times we spent together. Usually they are just ordinary life memories, like baking homemade bread with her and getting my own little mini loaf or going to get treats after she would get her hair done. And oddly enough, I even have my own grocery store memory of my mom from when I was 5.
As a child I was extremely shy and super sensitive. One day we went to the grocery store and there was a lady at the front of the store with long black hair that was teased out. She looked like a witch to me. By the time I hit the produce aisle I was in tears because I thought this lady was really a witch. My mom tried to comfort me and assure me that this lady was not a witch. She told me that she had a little boy next to her and that she was a mommy too. I didn't buy it.
Well, my mom was not going to let me get away with thinking this lady was a witch. So she told me that I had to go over to the lady and say hello. It must have been quite a sight for an onlooker, but my mom took my hand and we walked over the lady and said hi. (keep in mind I had not stopped crying this entire time) Then my mom made some nice comment about how cute her son was so that we did not look like complete idiots and then I remember the lady smiling at me. We then excused ourselves and made our way back to the produce aisle.
My mom said that we can't always tell what a person is like on the inside by looking at their outside and now we could see that this lady was not a witch, but was actually a nice mommy.
I may have only had 11 years with my mom, but when I stop to reflect on my mental snapshots, I realize that she deposited so much love and character development in me.
I pray for lots of mental snapshots for Austin, Alex, Alyssa, Amanda, and Ashley, too.
Saturday, November 8, 2008
Seasons
There's a segment of the Bible that I often find myself going back to re-read and reflect on.
It's from Ecclesiastes 3 and this is what it says:
and a season for every activity under heaven:
Life is full of a variety of seasons- some we like to linger in and soak up, others we await the passing of- yet in all the seasons God has the ability to make it beautiful.
I often look at this poetic reflection found in the Bible and consider my own season. I find there is almost this "permission" to experience a wide array of emotions- really, there is "a time to give up" and say enough is enough, or"a time to dance" around your house like a crazy person because you are so elated. (Liliana laughs at Mommy when I do that- she thinks I am pretty funny when I sing tunes and dance around the kitchen).
Life isn't neat. In one day alone I can experience 10 different emotions. But that's the fun of life. How boring to always be in the same exact season day in and day out. I am all for variety and enjoying the seasons before me.
It's from Ecclesiastes 3 and this is what it says:
A Time for Everything
There is a time for everything,and a season for every activity under heaven:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.
Life is full of a variety of seasons- some we like to linger in and soak up, others we await the passing of- yet in all the seasons God has the ability to make it beautiful.
I often look at this poetic reflection found in the Bible and consider my own season. I find there is almost this "permission" to experience a wide array of emotions- really, there is "a time to give up" and say enough is enough, or"a time to dance" around your house like a crazy person because you are so elated. (Liliana laughs at Mommy when I do that- she thinks I am pretty funny when I sing tunes and dance around the kitchen).
Life isn't neat. In one day alone I can experience 10 different emotions. But that's the fun of life. How boring to always be in the same exact season day in and day out. I am all for variety and enjoying the seasons before me.
Friday, November 7, 2008
World Changers
I am a firm believer that each one of us can be agents of change in the world. One of my favorite things is seeing people tap in to the deep desires of their hearts and then realizing that God can actually use them to change the world.
World changers come in all fashions- not just people like Martin Luther King, Jr. or Bono. They are ordinary people like Mike and Pam.
Mike & Pam are on part time staff at our church.
What do they do you ask.. they are our cleaning folks. Each week they vacuum, clean toilets and the like to make our church sparkle.
M & P have 2 grown kids and are grandparents. Mike grew up in the foster care system and was eventually adopted. He always had a heart to "give back", but for whatever reason never felt like he could be used in this way. Recently God was tugging on his heart to re visit this long time dream. So, he did. About 2 months ago M & P showed up with this newborn little baby girl in their arms. They have been her foster parents as this little girl's biological parents try to go through rehab and see if they can pull things together to parent. Pam is up for middle of the night feedings, burpings, diaper changes. They pray and care for this little baby, hoping to deposit love into her heart during this vulnerable time in her life. I talked to Mike and he just started crying as he said he couldn't believe God would trust them and use them as foster parents.
I love it! God is not just interested in empowering young people to do great things for Him. He wants to use everyone, no matter what season of life- children, elderly, middle aged, teenaged.
He wants to use us in our everyday lives to be world changers.
Oh, for more M & P s in the world!
World changers come in all fashions- not just people like Martin Luther King, Jr. or Bono. They are ordinary people like Mike and Pam.
Mike & Pam are on part time staff at our church.
What do they do you ask.. they are our cleaning folks. Each week they vacuum, clean toilets and the like to make our church sparkle.
M & P have 2 grown kids and are grandparents. Mike grew up in the foster care system and was eventually adopted. He always had a heart to "give back", but for whatever reason never felt like he could be used in this way. Recently God was tugging on his heart to re visit this long time dream. So, he did. About 2 months ago M & P showed up with this newborn little baby girl in their arms. They have been her foster parents as this little girl's biological parents try to go through rehab and see if they can pull things together to parent. Pam is up for middle of the night feedings, burpings, diaper changes. They pray and care for this little baby, hoping to deposit love into her heart during this vulnerable time in her life. I talked to Mike and he just started crying as he said he couldn't believe God would trust them and use them as foster parents.
I love it! God is not just interested in empowering young people to do great things for Him. He wants to use everyone, no matter what season of life- children, elderly, middle aged, teenaged.
He wants to use us in our everyday lives to be world changers.
Oh, for more M & P s in the world!
Thursday, November 6, 2008
What about the church?
Several years ago Chris and I attended a meeting for youth pastors. The speaker said one line that has stuck with me for years... "Your goal as a youth pastor is not for your students to keep their pants up until they graduate; your goal is to help your students learn to love the church. If they love the church then when they graduate and get out on their own, they will have ownership in the church and want to make it part of their adult life".
I've often thought -What does it mean to love the church? Do I love the church?
At times in my life going to church was simply a choice I made because it was the "right" thing to do. Other times I couldn't wait to go to church because there was something significant going on in my life and I really wanted to share my latest cool news or get prayer for my current struggle.
The past few weeks on facebook, the subject of church has come up with various people. It seems as though going to church has not been life giving at all. What they are experiencing is very real and very discouraging.
Chris & I are getting ready to plant a new church in Madison, WI in 2009. We have a team of people selling homes, quitting good jobs & leaving family and security to help us on this quest. We are hoping to have a church that can draw in those who are currently disconnected from a faith community.
So, I thought it would be interesting to see if we could generate some discussion through this blog on the subject of church. What are you looking for/hoping for from your church experience? How has your recent season of church been life giving or life draining? If you had advice to pass on to our church planting team, what would it be?
Let the comments flow...
I've often thought -What does it mean to love the church? Do I love the church?
At times in my life going to church was simply a choice I made because it was the "right" thing to do. Other times I couldn't wait to go to church because there was something significant going on in my life and I really wanted to share my latest cool news or get prayer for my current struggle.
The past few weeks on facebook, the subject of church has come up with various people. It seems as though going to church has not been life giving at all. What they are experiencing is very real and very discouraging.
Chris & I are getting ready to plant a new church in Madison, WI in 2009. We have a team of people selling homes, quitting good jobs & leaving family and security to help us on this quest. We are hoping to have a church that can draw in those who are currently disconnected from a faith community.
So, I thought it would be interesting to see if we could generate some discussion through this blog on the subject of church. What are you looking for/hoping for from your church experience? How has your recent season of church been life giving or life draining? If you had advice to pass on to our church planting team, what would it be?
Let the comments flow...
Sunday, November 2, 2008
Ah.. Texas
So, I have this lively, outgoing daughter named Liliana. We adopted her when she was 6 months old. Most people have 9 months to prepare to be parents- we had 3.5 weeks. Wow, just even writing that sentence makes me tired- did that really happen?
She was born in Texas and my husband is quite happy about that. For those of you who have never lived in TX, let me just say a few words about TX culture. Texans are VERY proud of their state, to the point that they make nick knacks in the shape of their state. You can find TX coasters, welcome mats, baking pans, toothpick holders, (need I go on) and you can't drive a mile without seeing a TX flag flying somewhere. I grew up in Missouri and to this day I have never eaten a cake in the shape of my state nor would dream of having something of the sort in my house.
TX does have good things to offer and one of which is Fatherheart Maternity home. It's a group of dedicated people who provide a safe place for girls who have an unexpected pregnancy, facing all sorts of scary life decisions. This was the place that connected us with our baby girl.
So bring on the TX garb- I'll take the TX shaped bibs, bottles, blankets and country lullabies. I'm proud to be a TX girl's mama.
She was born in Texas and my husband is quite happy about that. For those of you who have never lived in TX, let me just say a few words about TX culture. Texans are VERY proud of their state, to the point that they make nick knacks in the shape of their state. You can find TX coasters, welcome mats, baking pans, toothpick holders, (need I go on) and you can't drive a mile without seeing a TX flag flying somewhere. I grew up in Missouri and to this day I have never eaten a cake in the shape of my state nor would dream of having something of the sort in my house.
TX does have good things to offer and one of which is Fatherheart Maternity home. It's a group of dedicated people who provide a safe place for girls who have an unexpected pregnancy, facing all sorts of scary life decisions. This was the place that connected us with our baby girl.
So bring on the TX garb- I'll take the TX shaped bibs, bottles, blankets and country lullabies. I'm proud to be a TX girl's mama.
Nanny 911
Last fall I became a nanny. Yeah, I know that's usually something you do in college as a part time job but these circumstances were different...
We have this amazing family at our church Steve & Christina and their 5 beautiful kids. Christina had various types of cancers that she battled for almost 7 years. She beat all sorts of odds. Her last 2 pregnancies the doctors told her that if she did not abort she would die, along with the babies. She couldn't do it and took the risk. Today Alex and Austin are healthy, smart, darling boys.
Anyway, after a tenacious fight, Christina died on Sept. 1, 2008. It was labor day weekend- she died on a Saturday and the next day her family showed up at church. I was the preschool/K teacher that day and Alex & Austin were in my class. As we made animals out of Play-doh, they shared how their mom stopped breathing and their dad was yelling her name as she was in his arms in their big bed. It was everything in me not to bust out crying in the middle of class. When I was 11, the same scenerio took place at my house. It was Labor Day weekend and my mom was in my dad's arms in their big bed as he was yelling her name because she stopped breathing. In the days following I found out Steve needed a nanny to help with the kids (ages 5, 6, 9, 10, 12) after school, so I stepped up to the plate. It was one of those moments in life where you know your past experiences are about to be used in ways you never dreamed.
I was thrust into a very intense season of life. My first several months there I would come home and my sweet husband Chris would patiently listen to me, help me process all that was going on with this family and pray lots and lots. So many questions, tears, sadness. I would talk to my friend Rayleen from Canada. She never met the family, but she would just cry and pray for them all the time. It's hard to believe it's been over a year now that Christina has been gone. (yeah, how weird is it that we have the same name??) I've learned so much from this family and their faith. More on that for future posts...
We have this amazing family at our church Steve & Christina and their 5 beautiful kids. Christina had various types of cancers that she battled for almost 7 years. She beat all sorts of odds. Her last 2 pregnancies the doctors told her that if she did not abort she would die, along with the babies. She couldn't do it and took the risk. Today Alex and Austin are healthy, smart, darling boys.
Anyway, after a tenacious fight, Christina died on Sept. 1, 2008. It was labor day weekend- she died on a Saturday and the next day her family showed up at church. I was the preschool/K teacher that day and Alex & Austin were in my class. As we made animals out of Play-doh, they shared how their mom stopped breathing and their dad was yelling her name as she was in his arms in their big bed. It was everything in me not to bust out crying in the middle of class. When I was 11, the same scenerio took place at my house. It was Labor Day weekend and my mom was in my dad's arms in their big bed as he was yelling her name because she stopped breathing. In the days following I found out Steve needed a nanny to help with the kids (ages 5, 6, 9, 10, 12) after school, so I stepped up to the plate. It was one of those moments in life where you know your past experiences are about to be used in ways you never dreamed.
I was thrust into a very intense season of life. My first several months there I would come home and my sweet husband Chris would patiently listen to me, help me process all that was going on with this family and pray lots and lots. So many questions, tears, sadness. I would talk to my friend Rayleen from Canada. She never met the family, but she would just cry and pray for them all the time. It's hard to believe it's been over a year now that Christina has been gone. (yeah, how weird is it that we have the same name??) I've learned so much from this family and their faith. More on that for future posts...
Tina enters the 21 century
So I am finally entering into the 21 century. One day earlier this year I had a TON of e-mails and I couldn't figure out why. Later that day my husband told me that it was time I used facebook, so he set up an account for me and I had all those e-mails from people seeing my account. Thus Tina's journey of technology began. I was resistant at first, but it actually has been good connecting with old friends and seeing their new seasons of life.
Next came texting. The thought of texting reminded me of my days as a youth leader and I wasn't really too keen on trying to act like a teenager. We got a new phone plan with texting included and I have to admit- I really like it.
So, now I enter the world of blogs. I was actually inspired to do this by a few friends- one of whom is Robin. She is one of my old YWAM friends who just happens to be an English major. I love Robin's love for writing and always enjoyed reading what she had to say, so I checked out her blog. If Robin can do it, so can I.
I am looking forward to sharing thoughts and learning from others. One of my favorite questions to ask people is "What is God teaching you or doing in your life these days?" I love hearing people's answers to that question. In fact I had a friend confess to me that anytime I invited her over to my house she would practice what she was going to say b/c she knew that question was guaranteed to come up.
(now that I think of it, she hasn't been over in awhile...)
Next came texting. The thought of texting reminded me of my days as a youth leader and I wasn't really too keen on trying to act like a teenager. We got a new phone plan with texting included and I have to admit- I really like it.
So, now I enter the world of blogs. I was actually inspired to do this by a few friends- one of whom is Robin. She is one of my old YWAM friends who just happens to be an English major. I love Robin's love for writing and always enjoyed reading what she had to say, so I checked out her blog. If Robin can do it, so can I.
I am looking forward to sharing thoughts and learning from others. One of my favorite questions to ask people is "What is God teaching you or doing in your life these days?" I love hearing people's answers to that question. In fact I had a friend confess to me that anytime I invited her over to my house she would practice what she was going to say b/c she knew that question was guaranteed to come up.
(now that I think of it, she hasn't been over in awhile...)
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