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My first year of marriage Chris and I were in YWAM, which meant we had very little income. On one hand, I remember each month having to pray for what we needed and at times it was quite stressful. Yet on the other hand, that first year of marriage, we traveled to New Zealand for a 2.5 week honeymoon, to Austria (which was a childhood dream for Chris), Germany, France, Guatemala, Mexico and all over the USA. Each trip came from unsolicited, totally random people wanting to get us to these places. I remember on one of our plane rides thinking- this is what rich people do and look at us! We felt rich in experiences, adventure, travel and FAITH.

So fast forward to year 8 of marriage. We are in this weird transitional spot of church planting in Madison, yet still being in St. Louis due to some legal issues with our adoption. Chris got a job at St. Louis Bread Co. and I am watching kids part time until we move. We are back in this financial season of having to count each dollar and trust God in ways we haven't had to do in years. I haven't exactly been thrilled with having such a high accountability level with our finances, yet God is meeting us and I know He is in it. I remember after I left YWAM I wanted to always know that God was my source and that I need to depend on Him, but I did NOT want to go back to those intense times of dependency. And yet, I don't know why. In those intense times of dependency, God shows up.

I have been starting to write down our provision story for this year and it's so encouraging. We both got to travel to Rwanda this past spring, which was Chris' first time in Africa and a desire of his for years. We had several financial gifts for our adoption, both small & large, that covered all our expenses. I remember opening a card from a new lady at church and I didn't even know her name. In it was $10 and I was so touched. She had no idea what that $10 was going to do when added with the other gifts. Another day I went to the mail box and there was a check for $1000 from a couple I had never even met before! We received an ABUNDANCE for Liliana in gifts. We also have received some generous and very random donations towards our church planting efforts. On and on the list goes. It has been a year of intense dependency in many ways, but to that same measure God has shown up.

So, it makes me think..maybe this season isn't so bad after all. It's been a great reminder for me that God truly is my source and when it comes down to it I don't think I would want it any other way. Year 1 of marriage was an incredible faith building time and year 8 is as well. These faith walks are scary at times, but so worth it!